


Strangers

by tyrionsonoftywin



Series: Turning Points [1]
Category: Scrubs (TV)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 07:54:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27669842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tyrionsonoftywin/pseuds/tyrionsonoftywin
Summary: "We’re strangers, the thought hits me as he turns slowly to look at me, a small, sad smile on his face and I know he’s going to read in my face all the questions I’m not daring to ask him."
Relationships: Perry Cox/John "JD" Dorian
Series: Turning Points [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2029201
Comments: 8
Kudos: 24





	Strangers

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was inspired by a conversation I had with john-lennon-t-posing on tumblr about JDox having children with each other's names. Then it degenerated.

There’s nothing much to do today, really. 

I look at my desk, filled with papers, and I sigh. 

Sometimes I regret being Chief. I wish I had more times with the patients, with the interns, with… 

_He hasn’t worked here for the last five years_ , I quickly remind myself. 

Right. 

But then, as if God or destiny or whatever _something_ is out there just listened to my thoughts, I hear his voice. For the first three seconds, I think I’m going crazy, that that’s it, I lost it. Schizophrenia, maybe.

Then his voice comes to my ears louder and clearer. 

“I don’t care he’s busy, Ted!” 

I want to run, open that door, see if that’s really him, but he does it for me. He opens the door, with Ted behind him. He’s scared, his hands are shaking, but his gaze is firm and for a moment we don’t speak. Oh my God, how long has it been since we last saw each other? Christmas, maybe. Four months. 

I clear my voice. “What… what brings you here?” 

Then I nod at Ted, who leaves us alone. Which is strangely familiar, but not that much, sadly. We don’t… stay in rooms alone. Not anymore.

He blinks. “It’s Sammy.” He breathes heavily, he keeps holding my gaze. “I don’t trust anyone else to touch him, Perry. _You_ have to treat him.” 

I open my mouth, then I close it. I want to say _I’m not a paediatrician, Newbie,_ but I know he would reply _I don’t care_ , so I stand up and I get closer to him. I touch his shoulder, softly, without even meaning it. Then I pat him, and it’s strange but then it isn’t. 

“He’s going to be okay.” 

When Carla hands me his son’s chart, I can’t focus on his symptoms for the first minute. Her eyes follow mine and she gives me a small smile. 

“You didn’t know.” 

I didn’t. 

_Sam Perry Gilligan Dorian._

“He… never mentioned it.” 

“Was it necessary?” 

_I don’t trust anyone else to touch him._

It wasn’t. He has a kid named after me, I have a kid named after him. We are connected for the rest of our lives, even if we see each other only for Christmas, by now. I can’t help to think about him, now that Jennifer is starting to call herself JD. And now I know… he can’t help to think about me. We’re still in each other’s lives, aren’t we?

And what gets me - I didn’t choose it, Jordan did. But he… he _chose_ his kid’s name, and he knew it - I know he knew it - that, at some point, we’d grow old, he’d marry too and we’d stop dancing around each other every day. And yet, he chose to remember me _forever_. Through his son. 

“I think it’s appendicitis.” 

He’s sitting on the on-call room’s floor, his head is leaning against the wall. It’s dark, my shift ended half an hour ago. I think he knows, but he doesn’t seem surprised when I sit next to him. He doesn’t look at me. 

“I should have known.” He says while he lifts his eyebrows. Then: “He’s only six.” 

I swallow, I try not to think about how the poor light coming through the window illuminates his face, about how his eyes are more intense, more blue than usual, about how much I missed him, about how much I want to reassure him, now. 

“He’ll be fine, Newbie.” The nickname sounds out of place; I didn’t use it in a while. I usually don’t _call_ him anymore. We’re too distant now for me to use girls’ names, and he’s not a newbie, not anymore. _We’re strangers,_ the thought hits me as he turns slowly to look at me, a small, sad smile on his face and I know he’s going to read in my face all the questions I’m not daring to ask him. _What have we become, Newbie? Why did you bring him here? Why didn’t you ask_ your wife _to treat him?_

He shrugs. “Carla said you… you didn’t know Sam’s middle name.” 

I take a long breath. “You… you never told me.” 

“I guess I didn’t.” He chuckles, softly. His laugh finds his way to my ears and he’s Newbie, Carol, Susan, Janice, and we never stopped working together and tomorrow, when I come here he’s going to greet me with his cheerful tone: _Good morning, Dr. Cox._ I'll growl, pretending this doesn't change my day for the better, just a little bit. I know it isn’t true, this isn't _us_ anymore, but right now… it feels like it. 

I don’t reply to him anyway. I don’t know why I’m acting like I don’t care, he knows I do. 

He knows everything. He always did. 

After what seems like forever I reach for him, and, thank God, he doesn’t oppose me. He puts his head on my shoulder, my arm is around him while his hands rest on my belly. _Why did we never do this?_

He smells nice. I always knew he would smell nice. His cologne is sweet, too sweet for me and a part of me is screaming, wants to tease him. But I’m too tired, and he is too. 

“It’s late.” He says, at some point. I don’t know if he’s talking about the time or about us. “What are we doing?” 

So... how I'm supposed to answer, to _that?_ He doesn’t move, but he tenses. “Perry, we shouldn’t…” 

“Shut up,” I whisper, closing my eyes, then I stroke his shoulder with my thumb. “please.” 

He relaxes again. “I missed you.” 

He doesn’t need me to say that I did, too. 

“What happened?” 

Jordan says as I open the door. I shake my head. “Tough day.” 

“You want to talk?” 

I don’t. What would I say to her, anyway? 

She doesn’t wait for me to answer. “Jennifer won’t sleep.” 

I sigh, I take off my coat and put it on the sofa, heading towards her room. 

She _is_ sleeping, after all. She moves too much in her sleep, I think, as I note the blanket not covering her anymore. I tuck her in, kissing her on the forehead. She doesn’t have his genes, then why when I look at her I can only see how much they are alike? 

She is becoming so kind, optimistic, energetic. She’s nothing like me or Jordan. This is all him. I wonder if he thinks the same, about Sam.

“Goodnight, JD.” I whisper.


End file.
